Breakup Advice from Grandma

“They’re all assholes,” she said.


I cried – flung across my bed. “He doesn’t like me and he asked Michelle to go to Great America!”

"Pick an asshole and grow old with him. Yes, honey - you can have a new boyfriend every year, but when will you stick with someone?

The first five years were us just getting to know one another. The next ten were about becoming a family. Relationships take work."


At 12, I assumed she had a sidecar for lunch. At 35, Grandma's breakup advice makes for good common sense.